Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
MacSpeech (Not-really)Dictate
This is my first blog post using MacSpeech Dictate no dictation. Sometimes I get really tired of typing so maybe I can use this instead of having to type everything on the keyboard. So far, it looks like it's doing a pretty good job. Last night, in June from weight. Was wrong. That was wrong. John Ju. Dictation is having a hard time with my wife's name. HJ, wait I forgot what I was going to say. Oh yes I remember, HJ spent a lot of time last night training the computer to listen to her voice. Well, so far this is going pretty well I just can't think of what I want to say. But, isn't that always the case? Well, keep on the lookout for her more blog posts, wait keep on the lookout for more blog posts and e-mails straight from tax not rate weight. Straight from tax. This stupid machine doesn't even know my name. I am and in. I am a cat in in. I am 10th area at. I am is in. I am a need and see and area. I am a gay and I buried in an area. I am one day let's are gay and there you will be there in carrying. I can be. He. Genius and you are and where you. This is genius is in this you are absolutely machine is so stupid!!!
Monday, June 02, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Office SPAM: Expensive Gas?
Compared with Gasoline......
Think a gallon of gas is expensive?
This makes one think, and also puts things in perspective.
Evian w ater 9 oz $1.49..........$21.19 per gallon!
$21.19 for WATER
And the buyers don't even know the source.
(Evian spelled backwards is Naive.)
Ever wonder why computer printers are so cheap?
So they have you hooked for the ink.
Someone calculated the cost of the ink at
...You won't believe it
...But it is true
$5,200 a gal. (five thousand two hundred dollars)
So, the next time you're at the pump,
Be glad your car doesn't run on
Water, Scope, Whiteout, Pepto Bismol, Nyquil
Or God forbid, Printer Ink!!!!!
Think a gallon of gas is expensive?
This makes one think, and also puts things in perspective.
- Diet Snapple 16 oz at $1.29 = $10.32 per gallon
- Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz at $1.19 = $9.52 per gallon
- Gatorade 20 oz at $1.59 = $10.17 per gallon
- Ocean Spray 16 oz at $1.25 = $10.00 per gallon
- Brake Fluid 12 oz at $3.15 = $33.60 per gallon
- Vick's Nyquil 6 oz at $8.35 = $178.13 per gallon
- Pepto Bismol 4 oz at $3.85 = $123.20 per gallon
- Whiteout .7 oz at $1.39 = $254.17 per gallon
- Scope 15 oz at $0.99 = $8.45 per gallon
Evian w ater 9 oz $1.49..........$21.19 per gallon!
$21.19 for WATER
And the buyers don't even know the source.
(Evian spelled backwards is Naive.)
Ever wonder why computer printers are so cheap?
So they have you hooked for the ink.
Someone calculated the cost of the ink at
...You won't believe it
...But it is true
$5,200 a gal. (five thousand two hundred dollars)
So, the next time you're at the pump,
Be glad your car doesn't run on
Water, Scope, Whiteout, Pepto Bismol, Nyquil
Or God forbid, Printer Ink!!!!!
Now, find the cheapest gas in your area!
Friday, July 13, 2007
Saturday, June 09, 2007
Funny Bunnies
If you're looking for some giggles and would like to see some movies, very fast! Then, check out these bunnies!
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Guy who can catch sunglasses with his face
This is one of the funniest / coolest videos I've seen this month!
Monday, April 23, 2007
Hotel Riddle
Three guys went to a hotel manager for a room. The manager said a room would be $30. They all paid $10. The bellman took their luggage up to their room, but when he came back down the manager told him that he charged $5 extra for the room and to bring the $5 back. The bellman was mad though because the guys didn't tip him so he took $2 and gave the men $3 back. So each man ended up paying $9 for the room. 3 people x $9 = $27 but $27+$2 = $29
Where did the extra dollar go?
Answer
Where did the extra dollar go?
Answer
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Holy Crap!
This is a good one from Google. I took screen captures in case they take down their April Fool's Website.
Saturday, February 24, 2007
Assainate your Cold!
I have no idea what this character is doing on a display of over-the-counter drugs.
Some funny video (R-Rating)
This one was forwarded to us from Sheryl.
And another Hyunjoo and I found just fishing around on the internet...
And another Hyunjoo and I found just fishing around on the internet...
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
You'll have to look real close!
This was forwarded to me from Katya. Please send her all your comments! I'm sure you'll have some.
First... TURN ON your speakers so you can hear the "narration"...
Then click on this link!
Find the differences... look real close (to your screen)!
First... TURN ON your speakers so you can hear the "narration"...
Then click on this link!
Find the differences... look real close (to your screen)!
Saturday, June 03, 2006
Cockaroach!
I dunno what Hyunjoo goes on about... me over-reacting. Look, when I see one of these critters... it's all out war in my opinion. They might be able to survive the next nuclear holocaust, but they ain't gettin' by me and my double-slinging termination techniques. I might just have found out my next calling... bug busters!
Friday, January 13, 2006
2005 Darwin Awards
When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.....
And now, the honorable mentions:
2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer...$15. (If someone points a gun at you and! gives you money, is a crime committed?)
7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinderblock through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinderblock and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinderblock bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.
8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."
9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 a.m., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.
******A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER*****
10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.
And now, the honorable mentions:
2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer...$15. (If someone points a gun at you and! gives you money, is a crime committed?)
7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinderblock through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinderblock and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinderblock bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.
8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."
9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 a.m., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.
******A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER*****
10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.
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